News, stories and views

Hold on tight to your dreams......

By Lisa Day, April 07, 2011

Five years ago, I was working for Coventry City Council as a Neighbourhood Manager as part of a national project working in deprived city areas. It was a job that did good things, but I was not really feeling fulfilled. I was living with my two children, then both aged under ten and we were still readjusting our lives after the sudden death of their dad two years previously. That death had obviously changed so many things for me – it brought my faith in God out of a coma, forced me to be more involved in a community and made me ask what really was I put on earth to do. If the kids’ dad’s purpose on this earth was complete at the age of 37… then what really was mine? What was my purpose? And how could I earn to provide for my kids and give them my time and influence as well?

I realised that some people don’t live lives that have real purpose, they do something that pays the bills, buys them the latest gadget and get by, thinking that would bring happiness, but until something happens they don’t really think about what they are doing and they’re not really finding fulfilment. I knew that I wanted to work in a role that helped people to find their purpose in life, to understand who they were, to find out what brought them joy and to look up to see the potential in their lives. For me, becoming a life coach seemed to be the way forward, but as I looked at this option I realised it meant self-employment, probably not being part of a team, and being home-based but with lots of travel and irregular hours, all of which would not fully suit me and the two children that I care for.

After numerous discussions with God and good friends, I decided to take a slightly less demanding job with the council, but one that allowed me to develop skills that needed honing and improving. This also allowed me to do some voluntary work with other organisations,for example, my then local church and community groups and to complete a range of self-development courses. I also received training by the charity Care for the Family for their ‘A Different Journey’ project which supports people who have lost a partner through death earlier in life. I loved doing this – being part of the events or supporting recently bereaved people on the telephone gave me an energy and purpose that I had never felt before. I also recognised that with every change that life brings there is an element of the grieving.

Then it looked as though the possibility of a paid job with ’ A Different Journey’ would be coming up at the end of 2010. I realised that this is where my motivations truly lay – I really wanted to work on something that would bring people who were in a state of brokenness into wholeness. With this in mind I got more experience with Care for the Family and other national bereavement organizations.

My job at the city council changed significantly to the point that I no longer enjoyed it. For a time I wasn’t sure what was happening and this caused major uncertainty for me for a number of months. I had almost lost sight of my aim. In December I went for the Care for the Family job, but didn’t get it. Lots of people had prayed for me and I was more disappointed on their behalf as well. I knew this was roughly the area that I wanted to work in, but I also knew that jobs like this were very few and far between, especially in today’s economic climate.

On New Year’s Eve, some friends at Care for the Family with whom I had talked at length after my interview, emailed me to tell me about a job that they had seen advertised in Coventry, of all places. It fitted with what I was looking for in many ways, with the things that were on my heart to do and with my family life.

I was successful with that interview, so I will soon be starting as Director of Operations for the Association of Christian Counsellors. Being in this place has brought me so much healing from things deep in my past that I can now use for good. I am passionate that Christian organisations are run well and people are trained to a high standard, that people when they need help (especially in pastoral care and counselling) can access appropriate support and that this is part of the full package of support that the church can offer a hurting world.

So many people who know me have said that this is my dream job; maybe its not yours. But we are all different, we all have a unique purpose in this world, we just have to find it … and hold onto our dreams.

The lessons that I have learnt are:

• God never leaves us or forsakes us – everybody else at some point will.
• Always hold onto your dreams – even when the going gets tough and you feel far from that shore.
• Always do the task you are given to the best of your ability, even when you don’t fully understand why you are doing it.
• If you want something badly enough / God wants you to do it, there will be a solution.
• Ask for help from others when you need to.
• Laugh lots.

Ruth Nelson